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15 Questions: Patrick Sicher

For the past five seasons, his team was the laughing stock of the league. From 2027 - 2029 he stepped up to the podium at the Draft Night Monday event to select the number one overall player of the draft. Three times in a row. It's a badge of honor if you traded to have that right. Not so if your team earned you that right. But five games into the 2030 season and GMs around the league are starting to take notice of what is happening down in Houston.

Pat Sicher rolled back in the USA Football League with a renewed sense of zeal several seasons ago after spending a couple of seasons as the Assistant GM for the Miami Dolphins. He took over the lowly San Francisco 49ers and immediately began secret negotiations with the city of Houston to build a new stadium and move the club.

With the 2030 regular season underway, the Texans are serving notice that they will no longer be the patsies for the NFC. They lit up the scoreboard versus Philadelphia in week 2, losing a heartbreaker in the 4th quarter, 38-36. Then they had the Packers up against the ropes in week 5 before surrendering the lead in the final minutes.

Kind of hard to believe, but the Texans turn-around is just about complete. It won't be long before we seem them in the post-season.

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HOUSTON TEXANS GM Patrick Sicher

1. A few seasons ago you up an moved the beloved San Francisco 49ers to Houston, becoming the Houston Texans. You had high hopes that the change of scenery would motivate your team to improve. Yet you've had three wins in two seasons since you set up shop in Houston. How have you adjusted your goals and plans to get the Texans into the post-season?

Beloved? Used in that context it would be appropriate to use it as Ben Breeden's nickname. Pssst... I haven't forgotten about that deal B2. And now you are in my division and in my state! </evil genius mode>

Now, it is easy to say that we haven't done squat in two seasons because we went without a win the first year and just two wins last season. But looking closer at the numbers you can see this team is headed in the right direction.

Our last season in San Fran we allowed 509 points. Season 1 in Houston we allowed 417 and last season we allowed 316. And if you see, we had only won close games in all our previous victories, but this last season we had two convincing wins against Pittsburgh. We also held our ground against the Skins and came very close to having back to back road victories against Arizona and Detroit. The heart breaking moment of the season had to have been when Willie Caufield missed a 17 yard FG that would have won iced a victory against the NFC East Champion Eagles. Needless to say Caufield is job hunting this offseason.

We really haven't adjusted our goals, we weren't expecting to be good for a while. It takes time for a team to gel together. We have a solid group of receivers, a young and talented rushing attack and great LBs. Slowly this team is growing into a competitor.

2. Back in 2027, you drafted the highly touted QB Floyd Welborne with the number one overall selection. He's been your starter ever since. How has his progress been coming along? How much of your team's success, or lack there of in this case, rests on his shoulders?

Well, Floyd has a great handle for the game, his problem is having a handle for the ball. Of course, we cant blame him for all the fumbles. If we could clone Williams and Mitkiff and put them on both sides of the lines he would be an MVP candidate. Jean Lefebvre, the Titans GM, still thinks I made a mistake with the #1 Pick on Floyd, but once he gets protection and more time in the pocket he will grow into the QB I hoped for. As a symbol of the slights he felt, he wears a t-shirt under his pads that says "Il est Fou" and has the Quebecois flag on the back.

3. You also selected LB Tyson Owens and OL David Williams at the number one overall selection in the past two drafts. That's three straight seasons with the highest pick in the draft. Are Owens and Williams living up to your expectations?

Well Owens was a risky pick because because he had two obvious holes. His acceleration and his agility. Of course he is pretty solid everywhere else and it was a weak draft. Of course we were very pleased with his training camp numbers and hopefully his acceleration will improve this offseason. After all, Mack Welborne has proven that AC and AG are not the most important factor for an amazing LB.

Williams has pretty much shown himself to be a superstar in the making. I think he will eventually go down as the best offensive lineman in the USAFL. That is of course if Mitkiff doesn't beat him to it. Williams was an all pro his rookie season and can only get better from here.

4. What can the Texans fans expect from their team in 2030?

Well, I think our team will improve on the 2 win mark from last season. Again we play Pittsburgh twice so hopefully our trend against them will continue. We are hoping that close loses will be changed to victories and getting blown out will changed to victories too. We do play in a tough division, so we will have to hope we get the breaks.

5. What are your thoughts on the league's new Free Agency Market application and their new Trade Submission interface that was launched this past off-season?

I love it. Plain and simple Garritt is a freakin' genius. I do think that some stylistic changes could be tweaked on both but that is expected on something new. Also with the newness of the FA System there was some apprehension on bidding. I think it will be 2 or 3 more season before it is perfected and owners learn how to move their chips.

6. This is your third time you've been in the USAFL as a General Manager. How would you compare this modern era of the league with the other times you were involved?

Well, my level of activity should speak for itself. My last two times I didn't do squat. My biggest accomplishment in New Orleans was bringing Fred Hurtubise in as my AGM. Of course, I apologize to the league for that. I was Tom's AGM for several seasons, of course my job was to scout potential cheerleaders. It wasn't until 2025 that he actually had me do something and that is what got me hooked. Of course, we won a ring that year. I don't think that is coincidence.

7. How many other online sports league have you been in? How many are you in currently?

Currently USAFL is it for me. I was in BIRCFL/SCFL which was Joe Malloy's football league. I won four rings there which was second all time to Tom's 7. I was also in Joe's hockey league and in (former Chargers GM) Phill Bennett's GABL Baseball League.

8. How did you first hear about the USAFL?

Well, I think it was probably Joe or Tom. I was thinking about it the other day and I have known them for about 5 years. Also before coming into the league full time again I also knew Fred, Jean and a bunch of the USARL guys.

9. In our league, there are several different levels of competiveness. Describe your competitive spirit when it comes to the USAFL. What keeps you involved?

I am so competitive that I hate being at the bottom of the Seniority List! Thankfully DiP is there now so I can move on up! Seriously though, I would say I want to win more than anybody else in this league. Now people might say "you look like you don't want to win that bad" because of my recent track record. Of course, guys like Fred enjoy seeing me in the cellar but like I have told him during our friendly rivalry that the people who laugh at you are the ones you pass on the way up.

10. What one feature of the USAFL would you say is by far, the best component to the league?

I gotta say my favorite feature is the Depth Chart tools. One of my apprehensions about getting back into the game was the amount of work it took. I would occasionally help Tom with drafts and stuff, but in 2025 he needed me to cover on a grander scale. It was then when I saw how easy everything was and I was hooked. I also thought that the PG-13 nature of the league would not fit with my NC-17 sense of humor and controversy. I quickly learned that as long as you call the person you want to call an %#(@%*@ in private and don't make it personal you can get away with a lot. I think I have been pretty good so far. I mean, if you guys have put up with Fred's sarcasm... you have already been prepared for mine.

11. If you could have any ACTIVE player on your team right now, who would it be?

Well, I would settle for the guys on my team to play ACTIVE, but in terms of players from another team I wish Gene Carter were out of retirement. Ok, so ACTIVE huh? I know Tom is going to hate me for this. But I would have to say Keith Gunn for the sole reason that he plays in my division and has always run for 200 yards a game against us.

12. Let's say you do make the Super Bowl this season, which team would you like to face?

Honestly, if i made it to the Super Bowl this year, I would love to face Pittsburgh because they are responsible for my only 3 wins the last 3 seasons.

13. How many of your family/friends know that you are a hard-core USAFLer? Do you talk about it with them? Or are you a closet USAFLer?

Actually, I had to tell my girlfriend the other day because it was Draft Night Monday. I live alone so there is nobody else I really have to explain why I am home Monday's at 8pm and so on. Actually, Monday is Wrestling night, so I guess you could say that I am a closet wrestling fan, and inside that closet their is a USAFL Sub-Closet.

14. Describe your environmental setting on a draft night. Do you draft from work/home? Do you order out for pizza/wings/etc? How much paperwork are you looking through to make your selection, or is all your scouting work done on the computer?

Well on my desk I have a desktop and a laptop. I have the draft room on the laptop and the excel spreadsheets on the other one. I generally have dinner at my desk and am watching 7th Heaven before Monday Night Raw starts. I guess I balance the wholesome with the violence.

15. Which of the following would you rather have in your trophy case? One Lorne Sundby Cup, three James Maurer GM of the Year Awards, six NFC Championship trophies, four Bing Bennett Most Valuable Player Awards, five Tim Arkwright Rookie of the Year Awards, or ten NFC West Division Championship trophies?

Yes. Oh wait, you mean which of those I would want. I can tell you that I wouldn't mind getting the GM of the year because its the respect of your peers. But I have to say that there is nothing more important than putting the Sundby Cup on my mantle. That is the culmination of all the other awards you mentioned.

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NEXT WEEK: Dallas Cowboys GM Flip Sides