After over 40 years, Carolina changes coaching schemes

Panthers overhaul playbook on both sides of the ball
By "Bucky Katz"

Off-Season 2154 (Charlotte) - Carolina Panthers spokesperson Kaori Sato today confirmed what mini camp watchers were speculating, that after over 40 years of using the West Coast offense and 4-3 defense, the Panthers have changed their schemes.

'Our coaches have switched the offense to the K-Gun style and our defense to the 3-4 style,' Ms. Sato said in a statement read from her portfolio on the podium. 'We feel that these new schemes will take better advantage of the personnel that we have and lead to greater success.'

After the announcements, questions were taken, unlike the last press conference.

'Was GM Remley involved in the decision to change schemes?'
'Yes. Next!'
'Is GM Remley still involved in the day to day decisions?'
'Obviously since I said yes to the first question. Next!'
'Who will the team target in the draft?'
'Good players. Next!'
'Will the team be making any acquisitions?'
'Another stupid question with picks in the draft tonight. Next!'
'Will GM Remley address the media again any time soon?'
'No. He is busy. Any more?'
Silence.
'Good. We're done.' With that, Ms. Sato slapped her portfolio closed and walked out of the room with her mean looking posse.

Columnists have already dubbed the new offense the 'Tommy Gun' in a joking manner in Charlotte newspapers after the press conference.

Will these changes make a difference this season? We shall see.

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