Bengals GM gets fiery at state of the franchise yearly message
By "Who Dey"

Off-Season 2163 (Cincinnati) - 'We have to get better.'

With that beginning, Bengals GM 'Trader' Lee Remley indicated that he was not satisified with his team's 8-6 record and bowing out again in the first round of the playoffs.

'That starts with me, and goes all the way down to the guy picking up the towels in the locker room,' Remley went on. 'It begins with me and our drafts the last few years not producing. Our coaches need to coach better. There's a lot of talent here that hasn't produced either. They have to be better too or they'll be working at the Citgo orbital refueling platform soon.'

Cincinnati was disappointed this season as a team they felt was improving ended up regressing. After spending the last few seasons trying to rebuild the once proud Carolina franchise that relocated to Cincinnati with lots of fanfare in 2160, the fact the team regressed this season caused lots of concern in the Bengals front office.

'With the two dynasties in Buffalo and Baltimore in our division, we can't afford to settle for second best and especially third best,' Remley concluded in his state of the team address. 'I promise we will be working hard to make next season one we can be proud of or heads are going to roll.'

Reporters asked what was going to happen but no specifics were given in true football GM fashion.

'Nothing is off the table,' Remley responded. 'We have to draft better. We have to practice harder. Our coaches have to game plan better. Trades. Free agents. Players off the street. Whatever it takes.'

It looks like this offseason in Cincinnati just got a lot more interesting.