Chicago switches offensive schemes
By "Otis Tackleberry"

Off-Season 2106 (Chicago, IL.) - Philadelphia Eagles' GM Andrew Lewis is not the only GM trying to emulate the success Kansas City Chiefs' GM Steve Harrison is having running the K-Gun. Chicago Bears' GM Z-Bo Zabroski recently made a trade to acquire Carolina Panthers backup QB Chris Pegeuse, signaling the end of Christian O'Hara and the crazed 4- and 5-Wide Spread Offense.

Chicago is not abandoning the passing game, though. Instead, Chris Pegeuse is being brought in to run a variant of the K-Gun. The Bears plan to announce a K-Gun formation that bunches wide receivers close to the line of scrimmage to mimic the role of tight ends. Pegeuse's new teammates are calling it 'The Duck Gun', because Pegeuse pronounces his name Pah-Geese. Under the new scheme, Howie Barrett will assume Jamie Elizondo's 'X' position in the Spread and Elizondo will assume Barrett's 'Z' position. Sophmore Ed Parker will be the 'Y' flanker.

Despite not running the K-Gun in the USAFL, Chris Pegeuse ran the offense for 4 years at college. 'It's just good to be starting again,' commented Pegeuse. 'Anything I can do to help the team.'