Quarterback Questions

Why was Burt Franks Traded? Who's Gonna Start?
By "Gary Gray"

Pre-Season 2139 (Washington, DC) - Quarterback Questions

Addison Williams had a terrible start to his career. That's an undeniable fact. He started his rookie season and proceeded to play in seventeen straight losses before finally winning. Under center for a total of 28 games with a 4-24 record, Mr. Williams threw for a ghastly 23 touchdowns and 36 interceptions. At a completion rate less than 45%, this quarterback struggled to post a paltry 57.1 career rating.

And now, GM Ben Breeden is thinking about giving Addison Williams the reins to a team that won 26 of its last 28 games. They just brought home a championship behind the leadership of one of the best gun slingers in the league: Burt Franks. Franks was recently traded. A fan favorite, Irv Brock - whose preseason games were astounding - has also been traded. With a rookie and last year's late waiver selection representing the only other options on the roster, most fans and reporters have speculated that Addison is QB1.

Some area residents are steaming - 'This guy! This #%&$ guy!' screamed a local garbage collector, 'What was wrong with Franks, man? I loved that promotion they did... buy a beer and get you a free Franks' Frank for every TD Franks threw. That's a lot of Franks. And he won a championship, too.'

Other fans were a little tired of Frankss antics. You see, Burt was a media darling: club hopper at age 36, when he should've been supporting his families. A former child actor, his face was plastered on every disgraced tabloid in Boxmart. He endorsed everything and anything. Walking into a DC area convenience store, you had Franks' Mostly-Beef Franks, which taste like rubber; Franks' Energy Drink, which was sometimes used as a sleep aid; and even the Frankly Loaded Lottery, which no one has ever won. 'Take all those stupid products up the interstate,' said a longtime Arlington resident in reference to Burt's new location, Baltimore. 'I don't want to see his stupid face any more. They should have kept Brock, he was the future. Anybody but Subtraction Williams.'

The official word from the Redskins’ front office is silence. According to a source who wishes to remain anonymous because he is not permitted to discuss the situation, a decision has not been made yet. GM Breeden is said to be debating between starting rookie sensation Walt Evans – this year’s #10 pick – or starting a much-improved Addison Williams. After he lost his starting job a couple seasons ago, the coaching staff has reported that Addison Williams hit the gym and the film room with a vengeance. Perhaps more importantly, if he starts, he’ll also have a supporting cast that dwarfs the teams he previously helmed.

While Williams would be a relatively safe bet, the excitement around training camp about Walt Evans is almost deafening. When he first started camp, Evans was struggling with his deep ball, often under throwing his receivers. During yesterday’s scrimmage, he dodged a blitz from Tim Goff and launched a 60-yard bomb to the end zone that settled gently on the fingertips of Chris Anthony. Quarterback coach Cornell Millen pumped his fist and turned away from the audience, reportedly with a beaming smile on his face.

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