Help For Teams Outside the Playoffs
By "Mel Kiper, Jr."

Playoffs 2183 (The Great Beyond) - In 2184, technology has finally reached the age where the dead can be reached for conversations. While the cost of this is prohibitively high, there is one institution whose importance transcends money: The USAFL.

What follows is a transcript of Mel Kiper Jr.'s report on the upcoming draft class:

'Ladies and Gentlemen, I am beyond excited to reach you from the great beyond to talk about the eternal questions of humanity. Namely, who are the top prospects in the upcoming USAFL draft? I know you can't wait, so we'll get right to my Big Board!

#1 - G Mario Henderson, University of Alabama. This is the type of elite talent that can walk right into the league and start. He needs to work on his fitness and adjust to the quickness of USAFL defensive linemen, but he's an awesome raw specimen with the speed, strength and intelligence to be a force for a long time. If he can make strong gains in his acceleration, he'll be a sure-fire Franchise Player.

. Drafted #1 in the first round by Washington.

#2 - LB Phil Roberson, The Ohio State University. This guy is an awesome specimen with the flat out blazing speed needed to play man coverage. The one knock on him is that he tends to fade during games, but that's nothing a commitment to endurance training can't fix. A definite All-Pro in the making.

. Drafted #2 in the first round by Oakland. Rookie of the Year Winner.

#3 - LB Dennis Buckley, San Diego State University. A player very similar to Roberson, Dennis Buckley is arguably an even more impressive physical player. While playing MLB in college, Buckley was a complete wall against the run, with the only concern being his ability to make it to the corner against quicker offensive linemen and backs. There's every reason to believe he'll be joining Roberson on many All-Star teams.

. Drafted #10 in the first round by Baltimore.

#4 - WR Cody Bryant, Boston College. This is one college receiver who is ready to go. He already shows excellent hands, making numerous one-handed, high-light reel catches during his three seasons in Boston and the toughness to run over weaker defenders. He can work on his lateral quickness and acceleration into his routes, but there is no doubt these things will come. It takes a special player to rank this high as a receiver, and that's just what Bryant is. The early favorite for Rookie of the Year.

. Drafted #9 in the first round by Detroit.

#5 - QB Steve Callahan, University of Minnesota. This is yet another gifted athlete. After shocking the world by committing to Minnesota, Callahan followed it up by leading the Gophers to three Big Ten titles and a National Championship. He has all the physical tools needed for the USAFL, but many question his ability to hang in the pocket and, more importantly, to absorb the expanded playbooks of the USAFL. Still, if he can prove he's sharp enough to catch on, he'll be an elite player.

. Drafted #16 in the first round by Cincinnati.

#6 - G Keith Brett, University of Alaska, Anchorage. Many have compared Keith Brett to Mario Henderson, and physically, they are very similar. Both are strong and get good push on the line. Brett, however, lacks the straight-line speed of Henderson, and unfortunately, is prone to more mental gaffs. During his Senior season, he was flagged for six false start penalties, but there is enough raw talent here that someone will take a solid shot on him.

. Drafted #4 in the first round by New York.

#7 - LB Mark McNeal, New Mexico State. In what is shaping up to be a deep draft for linebackers, Mark McNeal is moving up most draft boards. He led his conference in tackles for three consecutive years, proving to be a strong and intelligent middle linebacker; however, his lateral speed and acceleration will need to improve at the next level. He's close to being a starter in the league, and should reach his potential early enough to have a long impact on the USAFL.

. Drafted #13 in the first round by Cincinnati.

#8 - S Tanner Washington, Florida State University. Tanner was a consensus All-American defensive back for two years. While he played safety in college, he'll need to either bulk up to stay there or, more likely, move over to cornerback. While his physical abilities won't net him a starting job right away, he'll easily be a nickel back in two years and top cover-man by the time he reaches free agency. He's everything you would want in a defensive back prospect.

. Drafted #3 in the second round by Houston.

#9 - WR Alec Caldwell, University of North Carolina. As a slot receiver in college, Caldwell showed fearlessness over the middle and had a knack for finding the end zone. He reads coverages well and finds open spots to show himself to the quarterback. Unlike the immediate impact that Bryant might have on the league, Caldwell will need to a little time to develop. Still, there's no denying the talent.

. Drafted #10 in the second round by Baltimore.

#10 - C Pete Tyler, North Dakota State University. I'm going with a bit of a long-shot at #10. While very raw, Tyler could carve out a nice career given the longevity of offensive linemen in the USAFL. He's not fast or agile, but he's smart with solid hands, both necessities for playing the middle of the line. He's a project that could, with a bit of patience, turn into a mainstay on someone's line.

. Drafted #17 in the first round by Philadelphia.

Well, there you have it draft nuts! My Pre-Draft Top Ten! I hope you enjoyed it as much as I've enjoyed finally giving my opinion once again. If only you could see my hair now!'

As a final note, Mr. Kiper did indicate that he used the standard weights recommended by the game's founding fathers when determining his ratings. They are determined on the objective data available to all scouts, general managers, and owners. Good luck to everyone!