Bengals franchise young offensive lineman
By "Porsche Lynn Commode"

Off-Season 2221 (Cincinnati) - The Cincinnati Bengals announced today that they have designated third year guard Addison 'Strawberry' Fields as a franchise player, guaranteeing him an $8 million dollar salary for the rest of his career.

Taken 14th overall in the 2218 draft, Fields has been on the climb since he took the field his rookie year for the Bengals.

Asked about Fields while lounging in his hidden lair inside the inactive volcano outside a fishing village in Japan, Bengals GM 'Trader' Lee Remley was proud of his young player.

'Addison is one of the young leaders of this rebuilding team,' Remley said. 'We are pleased to know he will be a Bengal for the rest of his career.'

Fields had plans for the extra income now that his salary has been doubled. 'Now I can get one of those cool shuttlecrafts with a cloaking device,' Fields said.