May Returns Home

Defensive tackle comes back to where it all began
By "Aki Kurikawa"

Off-Season 2325 (Charlotte) - The Carolina Panthers brought an old friend back home today when they acquired DT Mark May from Baltimore in a three player deal.

If you have been hiding under a rock in a Tokyo garden, Mark May was drafted sixth overall by Carolina in the 2313 draft and until he was dealt in 2321, he accumulated 113 sacks to place 11th on the franchise all time list. He was a very popular player during his years here.

Meanwhile, Panthers fans called it a publicity stunt.

'Well, of course it is!' GM 'Trader' Lee Remley laughed. 'We lost every game last season and our defense stunk! I wanted to give the fans a feel good story for once.'

May was glad to be back.

'I'm looking to get some more sacks and move up that list,' May said with a smile. 'I always like to make the people happy!'

Meanwhile, league pundits are starting to call the team 'Baltimore south' after picking up four former Ravens players in trades. But their GM has a plan.

'It's right here in the old noggin,' Remley joked. 'Of course, I'm not telling.'

Let's hope Panthers fans agree when they see it on the field.